Improving Trust

Extending my earlier post (here) on Charles Green’s Trust Quotient test (here), improving my strength in Credibility is related to my weakness: “Work on the “softer” sides of credibility—truthfulness, being more open, sharing more truth—about the emotional as well as the rational side of things.”

As you might guess, my primary weakness is in Intimacy, which is about is about how safe people feel sharing with me. This makes perfect sense to me — I used to try to keep a certain degree of distance (even intimidation at one time).  Apparently, if I were able to improve my intimacy score, then I would start to see that:

  • People would feel you are discreet [and] empathetic
  • You would risk sharing personal things about yourself [and] about others
  • People would take you into their confidence.

There are some specific tips listed below…I’ve bolded the areas where I think that I need to get better and italicized where I’ve made some progress.  I’m a bit chary of commenting on other’s feelings and I need to be more conscious about my non-verbal communication, no doubt.  I have stopped writing most stupid e-mails; however, my “fails” tend to be less frequent, but more profoundly stupid (see my “overthinking” mail (here).

  • You can’t push intimacy, but you can make it welcome.
  • Do not gossip.
  • Don’t be afraid to comment on others’ feelings.
  • Comment on your own, but only when not obtrusive.
  • Ask others about their feelings.
  • Demur when asked confidential information.
  • If an email would embarrass you or someone else, don’t write it.
  • Talk more with your eyes, ears and body, and less with your mouth.
  • Silence is your friend.

3 Responses

  1. […] Tom describes is most likely to happen.  I hope I’ve done that with my team (see my post here on “Improving […]

  2. Hi Paul

    My advise that I try and follow in the workplace in leadership is from John Maxwell “only ask for a persons hand when you are willing to show them your heart”. Make sure you are open, honest and truthful in your dealings and people will go and do amazing work for you.

    PS. one habit that you could change is when you are meeting with people in a work environment and you have your laptop screen open in the horizontal state and keep on working. This is distracting and as a leader open up the opportunity for other team members to keep working on their laptops during a meeting. I hope this would improve your “talking with your eyes ears and body.

    Regards Rogan

  3. […] on Sustaining the Value of Projec…Mary Adams on Measuring Blog Reach/Impact…Rogan on Improving TrustShowing real weaknes… on Improving Trustchaim on A joke that requires Thomas […]

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