The Hierarchy of Beards

You... a Hyneman?  I bet Kari can grow a Hyneman faster than you!

You... a "Hyneman"? I bet Kari can grow a Hyneman faster than you!

Finally, a guide to where one’s facial hair fits in the great chain of beard being.  I’m afraid I’m at “Comic-Con” right now (though my only “Con” experience is “Star Trek”).  I’ve had fuller beards before, but they’ve been pretty lame and untamed (in between a “Wandering Jim” and a “Brillo Brush”).

I have my quibbles with the taxonomy.  For example, it is a dream of mine to get to a “Hyneman” one day — I don’t get how it can be below my current level.  But it gets the lamer variants right.

BTW, kudos to my dad, who at one time sported the pinnacle of beard evolution — the “Claus-Esque”.  I hope it wasn’t jealously, but sadly his son’s malign influence has dragged him down to a “Comic Con” as well…

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